Nov. 6, 2004

The election and Halloween are now behind us and even in Georgia the climate is changing. So the holidays will be upon us and the season, that is the Yard Sale Season will soon come to an end. Estate sales will continue for people continue to die or be put away, but the average, “I just want to rid myself of all this junk sales” nearly come to a close. Only a few stout-hearted individuals still have sales for some reason or another. The classified section for in the AJC will soon no longer have a large masthead announcing Fall Garage Sales flanked with icons of Autumn leaves. The nadir of the season, the weeks before and after Christmas will have just scant listings in the paper, a few inches of ads hidden somewhere in the classifieds. I find this season a difficult time. Even though there is much else to do,(well there is always a lot of other things to do) the sales end. They disappear like migratory birds flying to warmer climates or fishes heading to deeper or colder waters. They always return but the holiday world is an empty but remarkable time. A time when useless clutter in people’s yards bedecked with small circular price tags is replaced with garish décor in red and green. Foil wrapped gigantic candy canes, fill in for discarded monitors, poorly constructed animatronic reindeer replace unwanted bread machines and colossal inflatable Polar Bears occupy the space where that huge pile of Fisher Price toys once dwelled on a sunny day in September. But it does indicate that it’s all a cycle. For in this time when no sales are held people are buying LCD monitors and disconnecting their CRTs, soon to be ex-wives are giving shirts of ugly colors to soon to be ex-husbands, and friends are giving friends candles in the shape of cinnamon buns. It is the wheel of life constantly turning as clutter is received then disowned.
I will continue this blog through the dead season with commentary on something of value, but I will no longer be able to observe life through the departing clutter of my neighbors and countrymen.
This week there are less sales. My knee pain of last week is gone. I have still not gotten my cat Tony his shots yet. But he still shows no signs of rabies. In my community the Kerry and Bush sign are slowly coming down but as I drive around I do notice that some Halloween items are still up. The leaves are falling and so is the temperature.

Miller Ave.-Candler Park

I came about this sale by a sign tacked to a light post. This had to be one on the worse signs I have seen this season. It was designed not to be a sign but more of a memo. This printer printed 81/2 by 11 had nothing larger than 24 point type on it. There is no way anyone could read this tiny print from a passing car. The seller did not even bother to use bold type. When I noticed the sign I was expecting it to say, “the meeting scheduled for the accounts payable department has been rescheduled from 3:30 to 3:30”. Anyone driving past this trying to read it would most likely cause a pile up on McLendon. Perhaps the designers of the so called traffic calming improvements on McLendon should have just put up small yard sale signs instead of these horrendous bulb outs. Traffic would have slowed down by people trying to read them or slowed down by people having wrecks reading them. Anyway I end up getting out of the car and walking to the post to read it. When I head to the sale at 9:15 I find nothing but a broken chair and table in the yard. In the driveway is a broken Kerry sign. One the back of the truck in the drive way are a lot of stickers for left wing causes. Perhaps this is all a parallel to the failed Kerry campaign. The Democrats signs were too small and they didn’t have their stuff ready. I don’t even stick around to see what this guy is bringing out.
I buy nothing and there is almost nothing to buy.

McLendon Ave- Candler Park Apartment Sale

This is a small sale on the front stoop of an older apartment building. There are several cheap looking Easter decorations for sale, one that looks like three rabbit heads made out of real eggs. The is a small hand painted plaque with an turn on the century looking waif on it with the quote “You don’t say” written above it. On the same table is a large metal sculpture of a fish. The seller also has an ugly abstract painting, a pair of inline skates and a book “The Everything Dog Training and trick Book:
I buy nothing.

McLendon Ave, Lake Claire

In the drive way of this house is a wide assortment of mismatched items that include a Curious George jack in the Box, 3 alarm clocks, a commemorative plate from Kansas City, a lacrosse helmet and knee pads, an embroidered print of Mt. Fuji, the celebrity Taboo game and old luggage.. There are a number of books and video tapes such as “The Road less traveled” and “The road warrior workout” the VHS tapes include a self made copy of Clockwork Orange and episodes of Twin Peaks, as well as a original copy of Ruth Leitmans “Wildwood”. Near the street is a cardboard box with a dozen or so little dolls in their original packaging. They are labeled “Impkins”
I buy nothing.

Palifox Dr.- Lake Claire

In the front yard and drive way of this home is a vast selection of items indicating the things the owners are no longer interested in. Among them are a bread maker, a zip drive a scanner and two printers. There is a large framed print of three Ibex. Across from it is an old looking record player, when I life the lid I find on the turntable is an Lp by Gid Tanner and the Skillet Lickers. Also for sale is a set of water and snow skis as well as diving fins. Culinary items include a Swedish Cookie Press and a home beer brewing kit. In the front yard is a pile of dolls and some Fisher Price toys. Near the driveway are two large toy cars, one is a pink Barbie convertible big enough for a three year old to drive,
I buy nothing.


Mead St, Oakhurst

In front of and on the porch of an attractive craftsman bungalow is a huge selection of mismatched clutter. I am impressed by how many ugly items I see here. It is not limited to: Some china from Poland, three patio umbrellas, a large plastic playscape. On the porch I find an ashtray from Miami’s Fontainblue Hotel. Also in the yard is a bin of children’s clothes and a box of cookbooks. “Out of Alaska’s Kitchens” contain a recipe for garlic bread salad, while the very retro “Wonders of the Waring Blended” includes the directions for creating liverloaf.
I buy nothing

Ansley St.- Oakhurst, “Huge Sale”

This sale is not huge at all as the signs indicate, but one of the sellers assures me that there is more on the way. Among the limited offering are several fancy corkscrews, woolen caps that say “The Goods” on them, one figure ( the lady Pilgrim) from a pair of the famous salt n pepper shakers from the overplayed Publix holiday commercial. I presume the Pilgrim man figure was finally eaten by the dog in the commercial. There is also a metal handcrafted looking safety razor that looks like an attempt at art. It does not look safe to use.
I buy nothing.

Lamont Dr.- Decatur

This is very much a classic Decatur sale, where and in-town family just wants more room and less clutter. Among the belongings they are departing with are: Reflexology socks, two pitchers shaped like bundles of asparagus, “The NYC Ballet Workout on VHS, “Miss Manner Guide to Child Rearing”. Other books include “Millie’s Book” the biography of George H. Bush’s dog, “The search for Significance” as well as a large set of books “Discovering Antiques. There is also a box of old Disney videotapes.
I buy nothing

Drexel Ave.-Decatur

This sale is in the small front yard of an older bungalow. Among the section is a lot of women’s and children’s clothes,
A book “Tips for Quilters” Several framed Ansel Adams prints, lots of kid’s toys a bread maker, an Atlanta Knight’s mug. On the porch I see four gas camping lanterns, but one of the seller’s kids tells me they are not for sale and that her dad collects lanterns.
I buy nothing.

Ponce De Leon Place, Decatur “Estate Sale” (so called)

This is not an estate sale but a crime scene. The victum is the earnest seeker of a true estate sale who is duped by the scoundrels that created this sham. Inside a Victorian bungalow is not an estate sale at all but a ruse. The seller most likely had a failed antique or gift store and moved the merchandise here. Or perhaps this is the shenanigans of some antique store owner wannabe. There is absolutely no evidence that anything in this house belonged to one person or that that person lived in this house. I doubt that anyone even died (or was put in a home). This grisly crime scene is filled with horrifying evidence ranging from umbrella stands filled with fancy unopened rolls of gift wrap to a room full of African art that looks like it all came over in the same shipping container.
I have but one word- SHAME!